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Poster: stratocaster Date: Dec 21, 2006 6:16am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Garcia: thanks everyone for showing up...I know that you guys are pretty amazed at the fact that I'm even calling a meeting of any sort...(****scccrrooonnnkkk****)...well, anyhew, I've had something on my mind...

Weir: Oh, do tell!!!

Garcia: well, all things considered we just finished one heck of a year and i thought it would really be something if we just started to suck from this point forward...

Band: sounds good to me!

Garcia: Great! anyone know where I can get a chili dog?

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Poster: SDH2O Date: Dec 21, 2006 7:27am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Band Management meeting with the band the following day:

Wilfren "Garcia" Brimley: Hey, if we don't get a raise, we're gonna play like crap. You know how hard it is to play this part? Now you tell me I'm gonna have to develop a heroin habit later on? That's really gonna cost you.

Stephen "Lesh" King: Got that right, show me the money or you will be subject to sub-par offal from here on out.

Ted "Weir" Nugent: I'll keep playin, but only if I get to wear Richard Simmons' shorts.

Hal "Kreutzmann" Linden: Well, you wont let me play my clarinet, so I want more too.

Leonard "Hart" Nimoy: God god, everyone, if it means I don't have to make any more appearances with Shatner, I'm in regardless.


This post was modified by SomeDarkHollow on 2006-12-21 15:27:31

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Poster: Arbuthnot Date: Dec 21, 2006 5:28pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Hey! No picking on Shatner! And yes, for all his seeming over-dramatic acting style, the guy, for his age, certainly stays busy in numerous areas: books, movies, television, music, art, etc.

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Poster: direwolf0701 Date: Dec 21, 2006 8:12pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Shatner Rules!!!! He is Shat-tastic!!!

His ego is rivalved only by his self-ridicule - how could you not love that????

One of the funniest guys in show biz (and, you are right, not too many his age that are that busy in so many arenas)

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Poster: cush11 Date: Dec 21, 2006 8:47pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Would you like some eggs with that Ham little brother?

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Poster: direwolf0701 Date: Dec 21, 2006 8:56pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

maybe with a Sh(m)attering of peppers and onion too ;)

me going nitey nite - feels later than midnight for some reason (yes, i'm lame)
hope your evening is a good one big brother - have a great rest of the evening

'til the morrow

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Poster: cush11 Date: Dec 21, 2006 9:13pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Sleep well my friend... I'm just getting back to you on that "just a test" thread right now...

This post was modified by cush212 on 2006-12-22 05:13:35

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Poster: Earl B. Powell Date: Dec 21, 2006 7:17am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Meanwhile in a double secret secret bunker, the CIA is cooking up some of the purest Lysergic to ever be unleashed on a willing public. Jimmy Carter, not satisfied with the performance of the band, orders tens of thousands of sheets of blotter be distributed through the spring 78 run. "Even if the band sucks boiled peanuts, the crowd will be so stoned, they'll never know it."

The presidents ne'er do-well brother parks his pickup truck on Shakedown, selling ice cold Billy-Beer and passing out sheets of Mr. Natural for change. By the time the show starts, an overwhelming majority of the fans are seeing trails dripping off of Wilfred Brimleys tie dye and chanting J-e-r-r-y - J-e-r-r-y.

Using CIA designed earpieces, the band is cued and opens with The Other One> Dark Star. Fifteen thousand Deadheads melt into the floor in disbelief. The rest as they say, is history.

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Poster: SDH2O Date: Dec 21, 2006 7:35am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Not present at the meeting were the replacements for Donna and Keith who had been purposely left out. During this emergecy Bunker Conference, it was decided that the two would be placed on "Double Secret Probation" and would be let go if "Donna" refused to stop doing horrible things to cats onstage. At this time, a pool was started to guess when this firing would take place. "Garcia" was eventually the winner with a bet of February '79.

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Poster: orchiddoctor Date: Dec 21, 2006 8:12am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

Oh, c'mon, you know they rigged it to let Jerry win. They always did. When Jerry lost, he farted, and he farted mean.

I'd let him win, too.

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Poster: SDH2O Date: Dec 21, 2006 8:15am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

The rumor has it that the farting was the hardest part about finding a replacement, because if it wasn't perfect, the secret would get out. Finally, after many long and potentially flamable auditions, Wilfred came through, showing the rare combination of power and endurance. Right after he had played his last "note", the recruiters looked at each other and knew thay had their man. "What an ass!" many cried, "Yeah, a complete butt hole!" said others. During his first performance, Heads in the first 10 rows were heard to comment "Damn, whatever his new diet is, its improved his range."

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Poster: high flow Date: Dec 21, 2006 8:44am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

I remember breezes from winds inside your body, keep me high.........

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Poster: orchiddoctor Date: Dec 21, 2006 10:44am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

May the four winds blow you safely home.

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Poster: SDH2O Date: Dec 21, 2006 11:09am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Grateful Dead band meeting January 1st, 1978

No thanks, I'll stay upwind.